I’ve got several blogs in my RSS reader that provide translations of the current stories making the rounds of local celebrity gossip. I have zero interest in Canto-pop, I don’t watch local TV shows and I believe that, Johnnie To excepted, Hong Kong simply isn’t turning out the same quality of films that it did back in the 80′s and 90′s. I don’t deny it, I look at this stuff because I enjoy looking at photos of attractive women.
For the most part, HK celebrity gossip is every bit as silly as the American stuff but there are extra dimensions to it. One is that the public morality is the equivalent of the US in the 1950s. All Hong Kong stars are publicly chaste – this despite the Edison Chen scandal from a few years back that showed (gasp!) that attractive young people enjoy sex. Beyond that, while I’m extremely grateful that people are taking the time to translate this stuff into English, sometimes the translations are just plain funny.
Anyway, here’s a random selection of items that caught my eye from the past several weeks.
Owodog has not dated in five years. This guy’s English name is Owodog?
In the film many actresses appeared in bikini. Owodog honestly said that he was very nervous. He did not dare to look at them directly and felt very embarrassed as he did not know where to put his eyes. Did he like girls with fuller busts? Owodog said that he admired more talented girls, being able to play the piano or draw was more important than a full figure.
Carina Lau denies finding surrogate mother. When the story broke a few days earlier about Lau and husband Tony Leung finding a surrogate mother in the US, all I could think was, “Is this how low they need to go for publicity?” But maybe it was the press just making up something to sell more magazines?
Kenneth Ma rarely brings women home. Apparently in this case it means “rarely brings women home to meet his parents.”
Niki Chow picked up after work by boyfriend in an expensive car. Wait! A gorgeous Hong Kong star is dating a rich guy? Stop the presses!
Jessica ends 2 year relationship. First of all, Jessica Hsuan is 40 years old and damn she looks mighty fit. ”Always keen to settle down, Jessica had been in a stable relationship with South African origin and vet Ruan. They have been together for over 2 years. Back in April, there were rumours that she invested in a 1,000,000 Hong Kong dollar property as a love nest for them both and wedding plans for next year.” I’m scratching my head over what she could have possibly bought for HK$1 million – I think that would get you 700 square feet in Yuen Long or a closet in Soho.
Linda Wong gets mean to keep an eye on her father. Her father’s been ill so she yells at him every time he tries to drink a glass of wine. The way she’s wearing that dress, she can be mean to me anytime she pleases.
BOY’Z announces reunion, invests 6 figures in an all new album. Apparently they’ve now changed their name from “Boy’z” to “BOY’Z”. Seriously.
Anyway, bonus, here’s a pic of me with Boy’z back in 2004 at the premiere of Harry Potter 3:
Fala Chen Afraid of Filming Kiss Scenes: Saliva is Unhygienic. Seriously, where to even begin with that one?
Mavis Pan: Everyone Treats Me Like a Prostitute. Mavis always turns up in the gossip pages. More on her further down.
Linda Chung’s Heart Toyed by Lawyer Boyfriend and Unwittingly Became Third Party. “ Shockingly, Linda’s lawyer boyfriend already possessed a long-time girlfriend, Joyce, who was also a lawyer.”
Edison Chen Turned Black-Face Upon Hearing Cecilia Cheung’s Name. Cecilia of course was one of the women whose pictures turned up on Edison Chen’s computer. She’s married to Nicholas Tse and the disintegration of their marriage has been playing out in the magazines on an almost-daily basis for the past several months. Now I don’t know what the original Chinese headline would have been, but assuming a direct translation, and trying to wonder how quickly any reporter in the US would be fired for using a phrase like “turned black-face.”
One Day After Grandmother’s Funeral, Raymond Lam Went Clubbing and Hungrily Kissed Kibby Lau. Lam of course previously linked with Mavis Pan. I’m sure he was kissing Kibby because he was in need of consolation. And a sandwich.
Koni Lui Covers Up Chest to Avoid Public Complaints at 2011 Mr. Hong Kong Contest. ”At last year’s Mr. Hong Kong Contest, Koni wore a plunging red gown. The exposure level of her dress led to 39 public complaints filed at the Broadcasting Authority.” Of course right now the bluenoses in the US are having a field day with Nicki Minaj’s recent wardrobe malfunction.
Mavis Pan: My First Date With Raymond Lam Was On His Bed! And every man is thinking, “Way to go Raymond!”
“We could not go to any public places. Our first date was at Raymond’s house. We laid on his bed and chatted for the entire evening. Then we hugged and went to sleep. This gave me the feeling that he was too lewd. I found him to be very good.”
Went to sleep? He was “too lewd”? But she found him to be “very good”? Uh-huh.
Finally, just some really nice shots of Li Bingbing and Jun Ji-hyun from a recent photoshoot for Trendshealth magazine, from here. This year Li Bingbing has been showing up everywhere, from the beach at Cannes to U.S. TV. Sometimes I look at photos of her and wonder why, other times I see photos like these: