A letter in the SCMP today, from one Tim Storey, of London, not Hong Kong, begins this way:

The pagan feast of Halloween is foreign to Christian tradition and has become a superstitious way of imposing mindless triviality.

Following that auspicious opener, does anyone really care about what else he might have to say?

But I do wonder why the SCMP decided this letter was worth printing.

Well that’s it. I’m now officially unemployed. I’d like to draw your attention to that sign on the right side of this photo, the one that says “Employees first!”

For years I used to joke that they should have changed it to, “Employees first …. as long as you’re in Burbank!” (Because the level of perks and benefits offered to the staff at headquarters was on a far different level from what staff around the world received.)

Now I think they should change it to, “Contractors first!” I mean really, talk about your empty bullshit slogans. “Employees first” from a company that just replaced 1,000 employees with contractors in India and eastern Europe. Like so many companies, they’re fond of putting slogans on signs that sound good, but when it comes to actually living up to them, um, not so much. Not that I’m bitter or anything.

So there was a farewell lunch for me and one other person who also left yesterday. No big whoop.

Last night, a pre-Halloween party at the PASM Workshop. I got there, they only had coke and beer, I ran downstairs to the 7-11 and found a bottle of Chivas. I took a plastic cup, kept filling it halfway up with Chivas and the other half with water, I guess the equivalent of a triple. And I had 3 or 4 of these within an hour. Considering that I haven’t really had any alcohol worth mentioning for more than six months, I got seriously ripped. The fact that I never had any dinner also helped. There was some food delivered and there were bowls of assorted fried bugs and worms and that’s about all I ate.

I managed to get off a few photos here and there before passing out. Finally around 1 or 2 AM I felt stable enough for the taxi ride back home.

This is Clarice – she’s one of the models I shot the previous week, when her hair was up and she was wearing a floor length black gown. Quite a different look last night!

Sorry, I don’t know her name. But wow, right?

Well, being that drunk means I actually slept for 8 hours and at a relatively normal time. This morning when I got up, no hangover, a little bit dizzy perhaps. I went to look for my BlackBerry to check email and then I remembered I no longer have any BlackBerry to check.

Oh, in the spirit of full disclosure, I’m going to be investing in the PASM Workshop. In fact, I’m going to be one of the partners (assuming they still accept the check from me following my performance last night). So expect a lot more posts and photos from me related to this great place.

Well, in about 10 hours, I’ll be heading into the office for the last time. I’ll be turning in my laptop, BlackBerry, ID card, office keys, corporate AmEx card. I will be walking out of there with my balls and my self-respect (and a more-than-decent amount of severance pay).

During the course of the past 8 years, I always made it a point to have a welcome lunch for anyone who joined the team, employee or contractor, and a farewell lunch on those rare occasions that people left. So I was more than a little upset that there was no mention of a farewell lunch for me (all of my staff are laid off but we all have different end dates – the contractors are already gone, the first batch of employees are gone starting tomorrow). Finally today I received an invite. So, one less thing to be grouchy about – there’s plenty of others on the list.

A few misc things that are neither here nor there but maybe of interest ….

I needed to burn a DVD of jpgs for my mom and that’s when I realized that I hadn’t bothered to install any DVD burning software since my last full re-install of Windows. I looked around at some freeware options and then noticed that Nero has a 2 week trial period with full functionality. So, okay, I downloaded and installed Nero. During the set-up process, it asked if I wanted to install the Nero/Ask.com tool bar to my browser. I un-clicked that, and on the next screen the set-up program told me it wouldn’t function properly without that and wouldn’t proceed with the installation until I’d rechecked that option. I should have shit-canned the install then and there and gone for something else, but I didn’t. And I paid the price.

Maybe I wasn’t paying attention during the installation but I don’t think that’s the case. Nero changed my file associations for all audio and video formats on my hard disk without asking me. It installed an icon for itself in the Quick Launch bar without asking.

I burned the DVD I needed for my mother and then promptly uninstalled the program. And won’t be looking at software from this company ever again.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, I went to install Norton Internet Security on my new Win7 set-up. The only physical disk I have is the 2008 version – I’d upgraded and renewed my virus protection subscription online. The disk I had naturally didn’t recognize the operating system and refused to install. I went to Norton’s web site, couldn’t figure out what to download or even where to get a download from.

But clicking on the “support” link, there was an option for live chat. I did that and explained the situation to the help desk person, who then used remote control software (with my permission) to log into my PC, download the upgrade files and install them for me. And then added a small extension to my subscription period as a way of saying they were sorry I was having troubles with the upgrade. I know Norton has its share of detractors but their customer service is first rate and I’ll remember that.

Now, retail customer service. This is a little silly, but who’s surprised when I do stupid shit? I watch the Showtime series Californication every week. I think it’s a bit of a train wreck but it continues to hold my attention. I realized that I really like the sunglasses that David Duchovny wears on the show. What brand? What model? Yeah, there’s a web site for that – lost the link – a site that looks at all the shows and figures out the fashions that the stars are wearing. Duchovny’s wearing Ray-Ban Highstreet RB 3301.

Go to the Ray-Ban web site, check for international stores, for Hong Kong they list the LensCrafters chain. I went to their shop on D’Aguilar today and asked for that specific model number. The guy checked the computer and said they don’t stock that model. I asked if he could check inventory for other branches, he said he’d already done that in the computer and that none of their HK shops stock that model.

And that was it. No “can I interest you in something else?” No “would you like to see something similar?” It’s not like the shop was crowded and he went to help another customer. He just walked away from me and went off to do something else.

Later, I stood in front of a shop called, I think, Hong Kong Optical, on Queens Road. Not too busy, a salesman came to the door and asked if he could help me. I asked if they stock Ray-Ban and he said yes. So I went in and told him the model number. They’re not some fancy chain with modern systems. He pulled the Ray-Ban catalogs out of a drawer and checked through them. “It’s an old model,” he told me, “We don’t stock it any more.” Oh.

And then … “Why don’t you take a look at the latest Ray-Ban models?” Well, okay, why not? I tried on a couple of them, didn’t like them too much and was about to leave the shop. He said, “Here, try these, I think they’d look good on you.” And he was right. They did, even though they were a completely different style from what I originally had in mind. Serengetti. Polarized lens and that whatchamacallit process that gets darker as the sun gets brighter. Since I’m useless in deciding on this thing, I called my gf, who was in a shop around the corner, asked her to come over and give me her opinion and she really liked the look.

And so that guy closed a sale on someone who was walking out of the shop by offering a little something called “customer service.” Some shops get it, some don’t.

Of course I’m still kind of thinking about those Ray-Bans. I see them in stock in lots of online sunglass shops in the US … thinking about it ….

Oh, the big man, Clarence Clemons, just accepted my friend request on Facebook! I’m so thrilled, even if it’s probably just someone at the record company or his manager’s office. So I’ve gone and downloaded the first chapter of his new book, Big Man: Real Life & Tall Tales, to my Kindle.

Today I had more time to spend with the Kindle 2 that Amazon kindly loaned to me. So there I was, sitting on the MTR, pulled it out of my backpack, flipped the switch and was instantly at the page where I’d left off. (Chuck Klosterman’s Eating the Dinosaur.) That’s super convenient.

One of the nice features of the Kindle 2 is that you can receive a free sample of the book you’re interested in – generally seems to be from the title page up through the first chapter. I’d done that with the Klosterman book, received the sample.

I sat there reading through the introduction, really dug it – thought it was his best, most mature and thoughtful writing to date. And so, there I am on the MTR, in the tunnel, going to the menu and clicking on “buy this book.” And the full book was downloaded onto my Kindle before the train pulled into the next station. That’s the good bit.

The negative bit, a minor annoyance but still worth noting, was that the entire book came down as a separate file from the free sample. So I had to go back to the home page, click on the new file, and then find my own way to the part where I’d left off in the sample file. Let’s hope in some future version of the software that they find a way to merge your purchase with the sample you’d previously received, so that you can keep your place.

Now that I’d successfully done that, I decided to wirelessly browse the store while still on the train. One of the books they recommended for me was Super Freakonomics. I haven’t read Freakonomics, so I decided to simply go for the sample free chapter. I got it in seconds.

But that led to my next negative surprise. I was charged $1.99 for the wireless download of the free sample. So for us international users, it turns out the free samples are not really free. Of course these charges can really add up quickly. So I think I’ll be turning off the wireless service and relying on downloads direct to my computer in the future. It’s really a shame that we have to pay a significant premium for what people in the US get for free.

UPDATE: My bad. I wasn’t charged $2 for sample downloads. Amazon has this current deal where if you buy Eating the Dinosaur, you get Klosterman’s Killing Yourself to Live for free. I never specifically ordered this book but it was delivered to me and I was charged the $1.99 download fee. I was not charged download fees for free samples. But I am not happy about being charged a $1.99 download fee for a book I didn’t order!

Overall, I’ve found reading books on the Kindle 2 to be a tremendously comfortable experience – both in terms of holding the device and the actual reading itself. There are six font sizes and, for the sake of this review, let’s call 1 the smallest, 6 the largest, and I’ve found that setting it at 4 works for me.

I find that the gray background, instead of the white you get on the printed page, to be comfortable – I think scientifically it probably goes back to the less bright light reflected back to your eyes, the more comfortable it is. At least that’s my guess.

At any rate, I find myself metaphorically tearing through the pages, reading at a very fast rate. When the train came to my stop, I didn’t have to fumble for a book mark or turn a corner down. I simply shut off the Kindle, knowing that it would come back on at exactly the spot where I’d left off. That’s nice.

I should note that when you’re reading a book on the Kindle, there are no page numbers, there are “locations,” which seem to correspond to paragraphs. So one “page” will have multiple locations. And naturally, since the fonts are re-sizable, the number of pages that an eBook contains will vary depending on the font size you’ve chosen. There is also a status bar on the bottom of the screen showing where you are in the book in terms of a percentage.

Most books have a table of contents and you can click on the chapter heading and be taken instantly to that chapter. Otherwise, you can specify a location to go to, the location generally being a matter of guesswork of course, and you’re taken to that. The Klosterman book has copious footnotes, and you can click on the footnote number and be taken instantly to the footnote, then click on the “back” button to return to where you were in the main text. Nice.

For kids, students and people for whom English is a second language, position the cursor next to any word and the word definition appears on the bottom of the screen, taken from the dictionary that comes with every Kindle.

One thing I miss is the ability to “flip through” a book. You can go page by page or enter various location numbers, but I found myself wishing there were more navigation options – in particular “skip 5 (or 10) pages,” “skip to next chapter,” etc.

Overall, I’m still enjoying this.

Coming up in part 3, I’ll review the iPhone Kindle app and investigate how it syncs your library and notes and more with the Kindle 2 device.

This week’s Top Chef, taped before Padma Lakshmi got preggers, guest star this week Natalie Portman. They competing chefs are told that they’ll be cooking dinner for the judges at Tom Colicchio’s CraftSteak at the MGM Grand. They go nuts pulling out cuts of meat. Then and only then, they’re told that Portman’s a vegetarian and that’s what they have to cook.

This is not a show known for sex or double entendres, with only the very odd exception here and there.

Padma (whom I consider one of the most delectable women on American TV) is trying to describe the taste of something she’s eating, it’s a little bit spicy and she says, “It’s like a little prick at the tip of my tongue.” Portman starts laughing, “Don’t say that! That’s awesome!” Right after, Padma says that the garlic blossoms are “tiny in size but big in your mouth.” Tom chimes in, “You went from a little prick to big in your mouth.” And one of Portman’s friends adds, “That’s what usually happens.”

Well, it’s been a slow day ….

I got jury duty? They have jury duty in Hong Kong? And they think I can be in Sai Wan Ho at 9:15 in the morning? Not only that, the summons tells me which case I’ve been assigned to. How quaint. If I do my civic duty, can I then successfully apply for an HK passport? Nope.

I did jury duty once in the U.S. That was a truly bizarre experience. I got this case of a guy out on parole who was accused of bribing a cop. I tried to get out of it. During the jury selection process, they asked all the other potential jurors a question – If you knew the defendant was arrested in a crack house, would you assume that he was there for the purpose of doing crack? – but they didn’t ask me that question when it was my turn. So I volunteered my answer – YES! The courtroom went silent, the two lawyers approached the bench. The judge whispered, “You wanna get rid of this guy?” And the defense attorney said, “No, I want to keep him. At least he’s honest!” And I just looked down and muttered, “oh shit.”

The cop was wearing a wire and got the whole thing down on tape. For reasons that I won’t go into now, we voted unanimously for acquittal. The prosecutor gave us this look, she turned and stared at all 12 of us, her mouth open wide, the look in her eyes saying, “I had it on tape! What more did you want?” Well, the guy had a very smooth defense attorney who succeeded in planting seeds of reasonable doubt in our minds and actually the deliberation took less than an hour.

It was an interesting experience. Can’t wait to find out what it’s like in HK. Can I sit there with my iPhone and tweet the deets?

The total number of new flats to be built in HK through the end of 2013 is 56,476. One third of all new flats will be built and sold by Cheung Kong, Li Ka-Shing’s company. 20% of all flats to be built in the next four years will be built by Sun Hung Kai. Sino Land will be building 6%. Kerry, New World, Henderson and Hang Lung will each be building between 4 and 5%.

In the four years that Cheung Kong will be building more than 17,000 new flats, K. Wah will build 693.

The government is not holding regular land auctions any more. They set aside parcels of land, valued at secret amounts. A developer can place a bid on the land and if it’s 80% or higher of the government’s secret amount, then an auction is started on the land.

But a tight supply of new housing means that the developers can charge higher prices on flats, so it is in their vested interest NOT to place bids and keep the supply tight. And the effect is not just higher prices – it also suppresses competition because smaller developers rarely have a chance to get at new parcels of land, helping the six largest developers to maintain their iron grip on Hong Kong.

I don’t know the answer to this. I don’t know how one would create a level playing field fairly. But I think one is needed. Because I think we, the average residents of this Fragrant Harbour, are getting royally screwed.

Paul Louie, regional head of property research at Nomura, said, “The land application list system is good in theory, but does not work very well in practice.”

Hello.

First, this YouTube video, found via Flisted. It’s titled “Chap-Hop History by Mr. B The Gentleman Rhymer.” The only information given is that it is the first installment of a series and that it is directed by Dave Alexander. Google has dozens of Dave Alexanders, including the late bassist for the Stooges, but the first one listed is a guy who does western swing music. And as an American, while watching this I thought that the guy’s received British accent seemed a little bit off. So maybe he’s not really British. Even so, I think this ought to bring a smile to most peoples’ faces. As a matter of fact, once you’ve watched this, you’ll wonder how come no one thought to do this sooner. (Or perhaps they did and I just haven’t encountered it.) The banjolele is a nice extra touch that puts this over the top.

And now for something completely different – Letters of Note is a relatively new site publishing images of letters old and new, some from famous people, some merely interesting or humorous, covering a wide variety of topics. This one is dedicated to one of my readers, Phil Z.

Click on the image of the letter if you’d like to see it larger. And apologies in advance to any Turkish people who stumble across this blog.

Apparently this letter has been floating around the net for some time but this is my first time to encounter it. A quick search reveals this page and the 3rd and 4th letters on the page would seem to attest to this being factual.

From the SCMP today … a 55 year old dump truck driver has been charged with 9 counts of “procuring unlawful sexual acts by false pretences,” the victim in this case being a 19 year old model who was introduced to the truck driver by her modeling agency manager, who told her the man was a Taoist master. The girl became pregnant and had an abortion.

The manager told her Au Yeung could perform ceremonies that involved oral sex and sexual intercourse, that would change her luck. As the model felt upset with her career, she asked her to introduce Au Yeung to her.

The SCMP eagerly goes into details (I’ll bet the Chinese papers are even more graphic) and I eagerly repost them here.

Their first meeting, attended by the manager and a friend, was at a residence on Hong Kong Island.

A table was set as an altar in the living room. On the table, there was an incense burner containing three sticks. Paper offerings and fu – written talismans – were placed next to it.

Wai said the manager and friend first followed Au Yeung into a room, then came out after 15 minutes.

When it came to the model’s turn, Au Yeung first requested her to place three sticks of incense in the burner, then he read spells. Au Yeung then held a pile of fu, written on yellow paper, and requested her to follow him into a room, where he asked the model to remove all her clothes. He then used the fu to write on different parts of her body, Wai said.

The court heard that Au Yeung then removed his clothes and told her to perform oral sex on him. As she did so, he continued writing on her body with the fu.

After that, she had sex with him.

The whole ceremony lasted around 15 minutes. Wrapping up the ceremony, Au Yeung burned some fu and poured it into water for the victim to drink. The model then handed over a red envelope containing HK$200 in return.

Au Yeung told her that each time they had sex they could not finish until the incense was burnt out, the prosecutor said. If not, the model was told, her luck would not change.

Allegedly, eight following incidents took place in this way, once a month except in December, when Au Yeung had sex with her twice.

Wai said that the model asked Au Yeung if she could stop having sex when it came to her fifth time. But Au Yeung told her that the luck could only change after having sex nine times.

Hmmm, this guy got a girl young enough to be his grand daughter to pay him for sex. He’s definitely a master of some sort.

Nothing in the report about the agent – who clearly knew what she was leading the model into.

As for the girl who fell for this malarkey, I predict her next job will be wearing a uniform and saying, “Hi, welcome to McDonald’s” 2,000 times per day. If she’s lucky.

I’ve been asked by a reader to give a mention to a new website, Asia Pacific Films. This online library is streaming legal, high quality independent Asian cinema. Access to the site is only free until November 1st and I don’t know what they’ll be charging after that – apparently it’s going to be a flat fee for full access to everything in their online library, not on a per title basis.

They currently have 127 films online. The first page of listings alone includes films from South Korea, China, Indonesia, Singapore, Iran and Kazakhstan.

Unfortunately things are crazy for me this week, which means I don’t have the time to sit at my PC to watch an entire film. But if you check it out, it would be nice if you pop back here and let me know what you think.