#1 – Rumor on the streets is that Fenwick will re-open in June.

#2 – Found out today that Spikey, my not-quite-9-year-old Golden Retriever, has hip displasia and arthritis. Vet gave us 5 different kinds of pills, have to wait and see how he responds to them. I’m at a loss for words on this one.

The SCMP reports that people are up in arms over an April Fool’s story that ran in the feature section of the Taipei Times, an English language daily newspaper. Here’s an excerpt from that story:

Pandemonium breaks out at Taipei Zoo

Zookeepers become suspicious of the resident giant pandas’ true pedigree after Tuan Tuan and Yuan Yuan began acting strangely

Taiwan-China relations were dealt a severe setback yesterday when it was found that Taipei Zoo’s “pandas” are not what they seem.

Zookeepers discovered at feeding time yesterday that the two pandas are in fact Wenzhou brown forest bears that had been dyed to create the panda’s distinctive black-and-white appearance.

The Taipei Zoo’s head of ursidae ex-procyonidae care, Connie Liu, said she became suspicious when the pandas, Tuan Tuan and Yuan Yuan, began to spend almost all of their waking hours having sex. Pandas are notorious for their low libidos, which make them difficult to breed in captivity.

“Let’s just say Tuan Tuan and Yuan Yuan would tuan yuan at every chance,” said Liu, referring to the combination of the panda’s names, which means “to reunite” in Mandarin. “They would do it doggy-style and every armchair zoologist knows that pandas favor the missionary position — when they do it at all. Their behavior caused chaos. Children screamed and parents became irate.”

Her suspicions were confirmed yesterday when she noticed that the animals’ new hair growth was discolored.

“Their roots began to show,” she said.

The bottom of the page says “Happy April Fools’ Day!” (though maybe that was added later).

The SCMP reports:

However, Taipei zoo director Jason Yeh was not amused and demanded a correction of the report he said had “seriously damaged” panda conservation education.

“We urge the newspaper to correct this improper story as it sends the wrong message,” Mr Yeh said. “The joke has gone too far which not only hurt its credibility but [also] … conservation education.”

The zoo had received dozens of phone calls complaining about the article, he said.

Lawmaker Wu Yu-sheng, of the ruling Kuomintang, also demanded the paper apologise.

The Taipei Times defended the story, saying readers should be capable of telling a joke from the truth.

Sigh.